Countdown to Christmas

Six days until Christmas… Are you ready?

I’m not sure if I am or not.  I mean… The tree is up.  I’ve got all my gifts bought and wrapped.  I’ve “decked the halls” and decorated my apartment.  “The stockings are hung by the chimney with care” ~ or by the window (if only I still had a fireplace).  And baking is on the agenda starting tomorrow, so it would appear that I am ready.  But…

Even though I’ve been doing my best to be in the Christmas spirit, this year it’s been more than a bit of a challenge for me.  For multiple reasons.

First and foremost is feeling the loss of my Pops.  He passed away this past June and this will be our first Christmas without him.  I think it will hit us all the hardest as we gather at my parent’s house on Christmas Eve.  On Thanksgiving his empty place at the dinner table was like a gaping hole, and not having him sitting there in his recliner on Christmas Eve will definitely instill a profound sense of loss in all of us.  I am dreading it.  It’s hard to know how much to allow yourself to feel.  Because it hurts so much, part of me wants to put up a wall of protection around my heart and try to pretend like nothing is different or out of place.  But I know if I do that then I will not be honoring my Dad’s memory or being true to myself.  I think I’ll just try not to plan too far ahead what I’ll do/feel and just go with the flow ~ let the emotions come as they may.  And… I will focus on the dear and precious loved ones that are still here with me and treasure the gift of their presence.  We’re all in this together and we’ll get through it.

A photo of my Dad from Christmas past.  Whenever I would ask him what he wanted for Christmas he always said “money.”  Well that’s boring.  So one year I decided to get creative with the method in which I gave him his money.   I made him a money tree because I wanted to show him that “hey Dad, guess what?  Money really does grow on trees!”  😉   And then I folded some money into the shape of a shirt because the cliche’ is that’s what you give Dads for Christmas (or socks or a tie teehee!).  Then there was also a little box that was a puzzle he had to figure out before he could get to the money inside.  Because as every kid knows… Christmas presents are all about the toys, I had to make it fun!  I put a $50 bill in it so he was pretty motivated to get it open, but it took him quite a while to figure it out.  Happy memories.   ❤

Another thing affecting my Christmas spirit at the current moment is our lack of snow here in Minnesnowta.  It’s interesting how not having that fluffy white stuff on the ground can affect your Christmas spirit.  Although I think it’s pretty, I’m not necessarily a huge fan of snow in general ~ it’s cold, hard work shoveling it, and dangerous to drive in.  Last year we got so much snow dumped on us here that it was ridiculous, but i neeeed it for Christmas!  I don’t need that much, just a little to make it festive for Christmas.

“I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas” so I say… “Let it Snow” and I’ll be “Walking in a Winter Wonderland” and find “It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas” and think “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” and then maybe I’ll “Have Myself a Merry Little Christmas.”  Yeah, lets see how many Christmas carols I can fit into one thought…  😉  Hey I’m just attempting to muster up some Christmas spirit!

I came across this video about Christmas spirit the other day.  Call me weird, but I can’t help it… I find nigahiga hilarious!

I guess everyone has a different idea of what Christmas spirit is.  And maybe we tend to put a little too much hype and expectation into it all.  There is just so much that surrounds Christmas time.  And depending on your own personal beliefs there may even be multiple holidays going on here simultaneously which adds even more to it all…

Well, as the countdown continues to click away the days, hours & minutes until Christmas, I’ll just keep doing my best to try to be festive and keep in mind how blessed I am ~ even when things are difficult.

And I’ll pray for snow…


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