I spent some time watching old home videos yesterday. They have been packed away and it’s been quite some time since I’ve thought of them let alone watched any of them, but I saw a post from one of my friends on Facebook of a young 13 year old girl performing Celene Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” and I was reminded of my daughter singing that song for a choir competition back in the 5th grade, and I suddenly got the overwhelming desire to see it again. I dreaded the thought of hunting through all of the boxes, but I had a general idea of where I thought it might be, so I headed down to the basement with flashlight in hand to begin the search, and sure enough it wasn’t too long until I had located the box it was in.
But when I went to pop the tape into the VCR, it ate it! Noooooo! I can’t even begin to tell you the terrible feeling I had in the pit of my stomach at the thought of losing this precious keepsake. Luckily I got it out of the machine, but as I tried to wind it back into the casing it began stretching tightly and I was afraid it would snap. I’ve never taken a VHS tape apart before, but I was determined to salvage it somehow, I couldn’t bear the thought of losing it. I carefully took out the screws holding it together and once I got it apart I gently wound the damaged, mangled part of the tape to a point that was a good distance past it in hopes that the rest of it would still play alright. Needless to say, as all of this was happening I was thinking of how vitally important it is that I begin the process of somehow getting the rest of our home video recordings onto DVDs and to make duplicates so that this doesn’t happen again.
I am happy to report that my efforts at VHS tape repairing were a success! And what a wonderful, heartwarming treat it was to be able to watch my little 11 year old daughter sing that beautiful song again. It was her very first time ever singing in front of people as a soloist and she nailed it! Albeit standing there and singing as stiff as a board, but her voice was so pure and lovely, I was almost brought to tears. At one point the camera had began jiggling all over the place and I got annoyed with myself, but my mom reminded me that I was crying as I was recording it, so that only adds to the deeply emotional and beautiful memory of the moment of it all.
Afterward, I got to thinking about life, how time passes, and how each moment is precious. I’m so very thankful that someone thought to invent cameras and then camcorders so that we can capture pieces of these moments as they happen along the way, and be able to look back at them from time to time. But may we, as we remember, as we look back at these meaningful parts of our journey again, also use them as a way of realizing that today, right now, is really all we’ve got, and we ought to try to make the most of every moment. We will never have this moment again. Even as I type this next sentence, poof that last moment is gone.
I want to live in a way that I never take even one moment of this life for granted. To realize that each and every moment I am given is a gift, and I want to live in it in a way that matters.
Even if this present moment is hard ~ just as the happy moments are temporary, so are the difficult ones, and they too shall pass. I still want to try and appreciate each one and let it serve it’s purpose in the grand scheme of my life.
This song by Joy Williams often comes to mind as I watch old home videos and has been playing through my head the entire time I’ve been writing this…